my twins?!?
Im a single mother at 19, I have to juggle work, school, and my darliing twins whor are 7 months….ALL ON MY OWN!!!
There father left us and my parents dont support me.
Everyday I Have to leave them at a sitter from 5:30 to 7:00 because i have work, then straight from work i go to school.
They cry every morning when i drop them off at the sitter, it kills me to see them cry, I dont want to leave them with a sitter and i know im missing out on there childhood, but i have to do what i have to do….
They dont understand that i have work and shool….
my question is, how can i explain to 7 month year olds that I have to work and go to shcool, also what can i do to make myself feal better, bev=cause i fell soo horrible leaving with a sitter sooo many hours 7 days a week!
please help!
Tthankyou to all who answeres, I couldnt possibly pick the best answer, because they were all so helping and they made me feel better =], so i left the voting to the viewers/poeple =]]]
This morning when I dropped them off, I htought about them and what Im doing for them, and it made me feel alot better!
As well for seeking God and a Church like one person answeres, I go to church every sunday with my twin girls, I’m catholic and i wouldnt want it any other way, THankyou all for answering! You helped me soo mcuh!
Thankyou again!
Looove,
Jackie
being a great mum is the hardest thing in the world, do I do this or do I do that. you are trying to carve out a future so you and your children can be OK, and there is no shame in that, infact you are to be commended for the choice you have made.
on leaving the twins in the morning, try to think of sometime down the track where there will be time to spend with them and great things you can do together,
If further down the track you can reduce the hours you work that will be a good thing but for now you are doing all you can remember that.
if you build solid foundations now later can be better. good on you for having a go
Filed under: Parents of Twins Support
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I think you are doing a tremendous job. It’s hard to go to school, work and have two twins! I understand it’s hard for you to leave them with a sitter, but keep telling yourself that you have to work in order to support your two babies. As they get older, they will truly appreciate all that you’ve done for them and understand the struggles that you’ve experienced in order for them to have a great life. Keep doing, what you’re doing and your twins will know how much you love them. Hang in there. It will get better!
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it sounds silly but…have a heart to heart talk with them, and do it often. explain to them your situation and what you are accomplishing for them and you.
children at a very young age begin to understand lauguage, they will appreciate your honesty, and in a few years will really comprehend what is going on. for now they will understand a little and appreciate your honesty and heart to heart with them.
remember, it is quality not quantity time. your a very very strong woman. be proud of yourself.
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I say kudos to you for doing everyhting that you can do to support your children. Its hard but you have to do it. whenever you do have time spend as much timw with them as you can. They don’t understand now but they will and they’ll thank you too.
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i dont think right now u can explain to them what you are doing, but in a few years, tell them and they will grow up appreciating u for wat u sacrificed. it comes with them maturing, u just have to address it at some point cuz if u dont, they might not understand the sacrifices u made. make urself feel better by saying to urself(after u leave them and are sad), "this is killing me right now, but its putting food on the table, and a roof over my kids heads, and allowing us to have a better life/future….therefore, it is not bad." think about it, if u stopped working and spent all ur time being with them(like u want, which is definitely understandable), there wouldnt be food and shelter for them. u should also get to know the sitter to make u feel like ur kids are getting the best care that u want them to have.
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I admire you for going ahead to better your position in this situation!
You will get ahead because you are educaing yourself and will get a better career eventually which will help your little family. Good for you!
It is very hard to leave children with a sitter like this, most mothers who work have to go through it!
Just tell them that Mommy has to do it to make their family better in the future. You can show them how the money you earn at work buys the little things (you could get them very small toys or treats, or save for a big one) .
You could even draw a piggy bank and show how the money you earn each week fills it up to pay the expenses!
Don’t feel badly any more!
Just enjoy your kids, job and studies: that’s life!
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Having a baby, let alone twins, without a father, at such a young age and no family support IS an impossible job. Too bad you didn’t think about all this before you brought children into this world. Now they suffer for your bad choices. That’s not cool. You can’t blame your parents if they aren’t helping you; after all, I’m sure you didn’t consult them before hopping into the sack. I think you should quit school and get a job that is part-time and go on assistance. Do whatever you have to do to make sure you are with those children as much as possible. It’s bad enough they don’t have a father, sounds like they don’t have their mother either. You really are responsible to do what’s best for the children, your schooling can wait. I know you are doing this to make more money in the future. You can go back to school possibly when the kids are in school full days.
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Honey you are a super mom and shame on your parents for not helping you. I know it is hard to leave them but the time you have them love them all the more. They will understand when they get older the sacrifice you have made to give them a better life. My prayers are with you and your baby’s. Keep up the good work it sounds like to me you are a better parent than your own parents.
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Hey keep a smile on your face. Your doing great. Smile and always talk to your babies.
Keep up the good work and your a great mom.
( Connie mom of 4 boys )
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Oh my, My heart goes out to you dear. May I suggest that this Sunday morning you get up and start seeking a church that beleives and teaches the Bible. What you need is Christ Jesus. Your most important task in this life is to raise responsible children. You as well as they have a soul that will live forever, it is your responsibility to see that they make the correct choice to serve Jesus. With Christ on your side there is nothing that is impossible. I know you feel like the time would be better spent alone with the children and Im sure you need the rest, but if you find a good church you will find a network of GOOd people willing to help you.
God Bless you child
d
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yrs of struggling as a single parent, When I accepted Christ, my life changed… I wouldnt go back to what I was for nothing
i’m sorry, i know its hard but u cannot explaint o them.
they can’t understand anything.
but my advice to u is to spend any spare time u have with ur twins.
and try and get the father for child support for all he has
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I understand you completely!
your doing well and hang in there.
I honestly think you need to trade your job for something part time. your babies need you.
I understand the money issue but there are always ways to save. work out a budget, figure out how much money you need to survive on as a minimum, and look for part time work that you can live on at least until they can go to school.
babies are so precious, they need their mum, I do get that some times its not possible to do so, but talk to employers about your situation and if they arent understanding then you dont want to work for them anyways!
you could always work from home…i used to sell clothes on ebay, second hand clothes, i made $500 one week…but please dont leave your job asap, for something like this, establish it first so you have a steady income, then think about it…..
all you’d need to do, is get all your old, decent clothes to gether, or buy some second hand stuff cheap, re-sell. it worked for me.
I wish you all the best! your so brave!
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mum of 2
preschool teacher
being a great mum is the hardest thing in the world, do I do this or do I do that. you are trying to carve out a future so you and your children can be OK, and there is no shame in that, infact you are to be commended for the choice you have made.
on leaving the twins in the morning, try to think of sometime down the track where there will be time to spend with them and great things you can do together,
If further down the track you can reduce the hours you work that will be a good thing but for now you are doing all you can remember that.
if you build solid foundations now later can be better. good on you for having a go
References :
they are 7 months old of course they don’t understand. There is NO way to explain it because they are babies. If you mean 5.30 am to 7 pm then you need to give up school for now and look at going back later. Your kids need a mother not a babysitter. You will regret this for the rest of your life if you keep it up. School will still be there in 5 years. Give your time to your kids now as you will miss all their firsts (step,word etc) they will bond more with other people than their own mum
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