My twin brother and I always thought our parents were good people until recently. My brother started dating this amazing african woman a year ago and I’ve never ever seen him so happy. My parents seemed ok with her because she is truly a great person and really is his soul mate. When my brother announced he was going to propose, I was thrilled, but my parents turned on him and begged him to "get out of his jungle fever phase and keep the family white." When he refused, they called his gf, blasted her with racist remarks and tried to convince her to dump my brother. My brother and his fiance tried to confront my parents but they acted like they are doing the right thing. He’s cut them off and I fully support him. My parents are now threathening to disown me for supporting my brother and not siding with them. What should I do? I am so outraged I stopped talking to them too. No racist answer please.

Nope, it’s never okay. They have let you and your brother down severely by this unfounded, disgusting behaviour. I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this. As hard as it may be, your best bet is for you and your brother to stick to your guns, tell your parents you’re disowning *them* until they apologise to all parties concerned and learn to love and support you both the way a parent should.

Familial love should be unconditional. They’re putting their prejudices before their children, which is an atrocious way to behave. Do not give in to them. Tell them in no uncertain terms that you love them but their behaviour is unacceptable and that they won’t be involved in the lives of any of their children or grandchildren until they can reign in their wilful ignorance and be supportive of you, your brother, and his fiance.

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Filed under: Parents of Twins Support

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